Cypress Spring The Other Half
She walked through that door slipped off that ring
Said "I'm takin' you for half of everything you're worth", and that hurt
I didn't freak out no, I kept my cool
I did what any self respectin' guy would do
I hit the tool shed and got the chain saw
Gave it a good rev and it didn't take long
To turn the 65 inch big screen to a 32.5
Turn the couch into a love seat
Turn the four wheel to a two wheel drive
Took a pair of scissors to the weedin' pictures
Turned treasures into trash
When she cut me loose, I cut my loses
That was that, yeah I got mine and she got the other half
She got the other half
I went loco on her Beatles vinyls
Split up the band for one last final time, that's right
She might have thought she got the best of me
But I turned her iPhone six into an iPhone three
And her high heels into flats
Yeah I got the last laugh (Ha ha)
Turn the 65 inch big screen to a 32.5
Turn the couch into a love seat
Turn the double to a single wide
Took a pair of scissors to the weedin' pictures
Turned treasures into trash
When she cut me loose, I cut my loses
That was that, yeah I got mine and she got the other half
She got the other half
Didn't wanna spend all my money on alimony
So I cut that check to cash, then I cut it in half
And I said "Good luck at cashin' that"
To turn the 65 inch big screen to a 32.5
Turn the couch into a love seat
Turn the husband to a single guy
Took a pair of scissors to the weedin' pictures
Turned treasures into trash
When she cut me loose, I cut my loses
That was that, yeah I got mine and she got the other half
She got the other half
She got the other half
She got the other half
She got the other half