Dark Angel The Promise Of Agony
(Hoglan) You tell me What will become of us? Are the lines so drawn and the stage so set That as we age what remains is burdened sufferance? My mortality looms, in its visage is doom And it's speaking to me alone The years will unfold but what is the use? In solitude I'm left to atone The sins of my past Are returning to gnaw at my core The scars I have left And those that have been left on me My purpose in life Is it unfair to assume I have one? I'm not fooling myself What now awaits is a nightmarish end What I'm saying, do you understand? Do you know what it's like to feel inadequate? And the future ahead has no place for you As if you ever thought it did& Alone in my shell, if I come out I'll die I don't want to escape though I should No, just leave me alone, I don't want your help!! Yeah, if you could ease my pain you would& (right!) No, you don't even know me! And your words of comfort fall upon deaf and frightened ears I lament my bitter fate Lachrymation upon examining my fears I've built a fortress around my soul, impregnable the door I refuse to admit you to my netherworld You're correct, I've absolved my self-control This spiraled course depression has me on Ag only!!& I'm a study in despair Domineered by the promise of agony! And the happiness is bound And the hopelessness is found I'm in agony!! Can't you understand Despondency commands my agony!! And I'm waiting to die alone& As I'm drowning in sea Of abused visions and shattered dreams A chilling descent into a phobic hell Insanity's blade performs it's correctional surgery Impending doom in this blackened room I can give this all away It's all so easy to capitulate Nothing is making me stay& Retreating within And hiding behind my wall Dealing without There's no escape from this moribund state Awaiting deep sleep We don't care if I don't wake In darkness' hands Though terrified, I feel safe I don't fit into the scheme of things! These years as an outcast are quickly wearing thin My carefree days are a thing of the past And I welcome the fact that I'm coming to an end Melancholy, my bride, I devote unto thee My, breath, my mind and my soul As silence washes over me I've never been so tired, so cold Confusion seizes onto me! Manacled and beaten, chained up by its frozen vice This is killing me But my mind is set, and I'm too weak to fight Have you any idea what It's like to want to die? Then you will know from where I speak This winter in my soul This winter in my soul& And I want to be left alone& Yet again, I have no answers The confusion of my fate takes its toll Symbolically speaking, what's another life That lists "ending itself" as its one and only goal? I've examined my options and I see nothing in sight Is there an avenue I've yet to explore? As of now, I'm decided I have nothing to live for& Defeated, alone Yet you laugh at the state that I'm in! I can't help what I am But you think this is all in my head I'm not asking for help But I want you to understand That I'm going away You guess if I'm coming back You wish I had a will to live? This condition I'm in didn't happen overnight I've hated myself for an eternity Now I finally feel that I'm doing something right As darkness descends I behold the candlemass I seek intimacy with death Again, you're correct, these feelings will pass When my memory is all you have left My life has metamorphosed Into a marriage of the twisted and macabre I'm sitting here now feeling the effects of my words Trying to see a reason why I should go on I have to wonder, do I still believe in God? 'Cause God no longer believes in me I lay myself down for my final peace I welcome death, my spirit is free& And I'm pleading to die alone&