Ethan Jewell The Dark
I cry alone in the night so you don't have to see my tears
And I'm the most unstable when I'm controlled by my fears
I hate how my body is so I avoid these mirrors
And I'm not so happy, things aren't always as they appear
The fog is slowly gone and it's becoming all so clear
The version of my happy self is no longer near
Feeling this way for the entirety of a year
So I listen as the sadness whispers things in my ears
I rip myself away into a lonely empty hole
And you take yourself away as I sell my whole soul
Digging into this deprеssion like a crying little mole
I fall down an еternal fireman's pole
Driving on this road alone it's already 3 am
My headlights try their best to push through the dark I'm trapped in
But the ghosts of the past stand ahead my racing car
They creep and they haunt and keep my thoughts and me from going all too far
My emotional comfort runs full out of gas
And I'm stuck here in the cold wonder how long I can last
So I bang my head to get the demons out upon the shattered glass
Hoping I won't survive this mental bash
I hike down this path and arrive at the witch's altar
I bow and worship this sadness that has become my martyr
She whispers in my ear why have you done this and what have you done
Why couldn't you have made the right choice for once
So I scream and I sob and I fall into this hole
My breath leaves my chest as I hit the worm filled soil
I see the stars and they tell me I don't deserve my soul
And let me tell you it's real f..cking hard to get out of a hole when they take
When they take, when they take away your rope
They sell happiness all wrapped inside a pill
So I keep writing these poems just to feel something still
This can't be happening, no this can't be real
But I condemned myself to this place, myself I have sealed
So I sprint into the dark to shrivel up all by myself
And I look at all these people, how we're all unkept
Secrets from my past come rising to the top
And one day I'll throw myself off the ledge in order to make it stop
And they sell joy all wrapped inside a pill
Our own unique character our consumption will slowly kill
Just swallow it down before you break the rules too hard
And stay right there, stay inside your own backyard
I want to leave this place, and never return
I want to leave this place, take my past and let it burn
I want to leave this place, and leave no rock unturned
Until one day I can make it stop
And I can make it stop