Jaytekz Final Words
[Intro]
I can't take this shit anymore
Everyday
I'm making my payback, I swear to god I will
I'll fucking kill every single one of them
I don't care
[Verse 1]
I wear this mask every single day
I walk around with a smile like everything's okay
But it's not, my whole entire life's in shambles
And my thoughts are always scattered like a game of scrabble
And I'm sorry if I ramble
But this is how I feel, and these emotions are too much to handle
And I ain't got no one to talk to
I feel so alone in these halls in which I walkthrough
I go to school and I get laughed at
And when I try to make a friend, I get backstabbed
And when I walk to class, they always yank my backpack
They knock me down and yell, “take that you fat bag”
And everyone laughs hysterically
How could they tread someone so cruel and so carelessly?
They don't even know my name or a thing about me
So ashamed, this world is probably better off without me
I feel worthless; Questioning myself, what did I ever do to deserve this?
I feel nervous every time I step inside my class
‘Cause the second I walk in, I start being harassed
They leave notes right upon my desk
Tellin' me that I should wrap a rope around my neck
Sending threats, that they'll kick my ass right after school
And if I open up my mouth, I'm only adding fuel
So, I stay quiet, and when teachers ask what's going on, I just deny it
And they pry it, they pry it every single time
Can't they realize these lies which I hide behind?
Or can't they hear it in my voice?
I fabricate the truth, ‘cause I ain't really got no choice
Constantly in fear, I walk these halls in pure trepidation
Why do all these kids cause me so much devastation?
[Verse 2]
Just a day at lunch, I was sitting by myself and got sucker-punched
They hit my head hard and knocked the food right off my tray
Beat me to the ground and poured some milk right on my face
They yelled, “this is what you get, you worthless piece of shit, no one wants to be your friend
I hope you f..cking die, so we don't see your face again
And don't you cry for help, or else we'll f..cking break your chin”
And everybody started laughing, as I'm wiping off the milk with some torn up napkins
I could feel my hands shaking and my head spinnin'
Body aching from the punch, knees and leg kicking
I grab my book bag and limp away
Thinking to myself the same shit, a different day
So I step inside the bathroom to be alone
And from inside the stalls, I heard a voice, so unknown
So I knocked and opened the door
It was a kid breaking down on the bathroom floor
So I asked him what his name was, and what was wrong
He slowly looked up and told me that his name was Tom
He said, “I'm sick of being picked on, sick of being laughed at; my life is one big sick con
I can do this shit no more; my heart is torn apart playing a game of tug of war
‘Cause one half seeks forgiveness, and the other wants revenge for the pain inflicted
They're the reason why my happiness is so restricted
Can you blame me for the way I feel and be vindictive?”
And I replied: “I feel the same way
Perhaps you and I were meant to share the same fate?
I wanna kill ‘em all, every last one of ‘em”
And Tom replied, “you need Guns?
I got a ton of ‘em”
From that point forward, we both made a promise, that would bring us so much closer
Looked him in his eyes, and I could tell we shared the same drive;
The same hate, deep inside from being victimized
So we shook hands and made a deal, that we'd keep our mouths shut and our plans concealed
A few hours passed and we met up at his house
The thought of finally getting vengeance made us both aroused
[Verse 3]
The house was empty with nobody home
He said, “my family's on vacation and left me alone
I feel disowned and to be honest, I've grown numb to it
‘Cause my whole life, all I've ever done was run from it; but that shit stops tomorrow
I swear to f..cking god that everyone will feel my sorrow”
Then he pulled out two duffel bags
He said, “this is for those who caused us trouble on our paths”
And each bag had weapons loaded; handguns, magazines and homemade explosives
We agreed that tomorrow, they would feel our wrath
And every classroom in the school would be a bloodbath
I finally felt like I had power, and when tomorrow comes, I'll show them all who's the real coward
For all the tears that they made me shed, for all the fear that made me wish that I was f..cking dead
I just wish I had some help
I wish the ones I loved did not ignore my mental health
My parents hardly speak to me, how could they ever tell?
I'm a danger to myself and now society as well, and it's too late
I'm so broken, way beyond repair
Tired of hoping that somebody out there really cares
But maybe now they will finally pay some attention
Maybe now, they will finally show some affection
And to the kids at school, I hope that you regret the torment that you put me through
All I wanted was a friend, someone to have my back
To put my pain at ease, and place my mind back on track
I've been bullied my entire life
My heart is filled with hatred, agony and so much strife
This was the only way I could escape
I had to let go and finally lose my grip with faith
These are my finals words, and by now I'm probably dead, underneath the dirt
I am the product of a blessing that was once neglected
I am the product of an angel that became demented
I promise you, I'm not the only one
Pay attention to the closest and the lonely ones
Try and help, before it's too late
Before they end up just like me and meet their doomsday
[Outro]
Just today there was a shooting at [?] Highschool
Shooters were identified as two males by the names of Christian Davis and Tom Wilson
Christian and Tom were both seniors at [?] Highschool and were expected to graduate this coming June
Security camera footage showed both males approaching the entrance of the building with one duffle bag in each hand
Officers said inside the duffle bags were weapons, magazines, and homemade explosives
Reports say there were eight students in critical conditions, five teachers wounded, and fifteen students pronounced dead