John Cooper Clarke Daily Express (you Never See A Nipple In)
I've seen the poison letters of the horrible hacks
About the yellow peril and the reds and the blacks
And the TUC and its treacherous acts
Kremlin money, all right Jack
I've seen how democracy is under duress
But I've never seen a nipple in the Daily Express
I've seen the suede jackboot, the verbal cosh
Whitehouse Whitelaw whitewash
Blood uptown where the vandals rule
Classroom mafia scandal school
They accuse, I confess
I've never seen a nipple in the Daily Express
Angry columns scream in pain
Love in vain domestic strain
Divorce disease it eats away
The family structure day by day
In the grim pursuit of happiness
I've never seen a nipple in the Daily Express
This paper's boring, mindless, mean
Full of pornography, the kind that's clean
Where William Hickey meets Michael Caine
Again and again and again and again
I've seen millionaires on the DHSS
But I've never seen a nipple in the Daily Express