John Kander Show People
CHRISTOPHER
(spoken)
Wait a moment
You say that you are from homicide
CIOFFI
(spoken)
Ah, well, yes
Based on preliminary autopsy it is clear that Jessica
Cranshaw was murdered
CHRISTOPHER
And what are they gonna do with her killer
I mean does he get some kind of trophy or Pontiac
convertible
CARMEN
Listen people
With Georgia taking over the lead
We go ourselves a real shot
The show is going on
What do ya say gang, are ya with me?
MAN 1
You know if we leave now
We can make that last train back to New York
(cast starts to all talk at once)
CARMEN
(spoken)
STOP!
(sung)
It’s clear that everyone of you
Is in perfect physical condition
So the show must go on
MAN 2
(spoken)
Why?
CARMEN
(sung)
Because as old as time itself
There is a grand theatrical tradition
That the show must go on
WOMAN
(spoken)
Forget it!
CARMEN
(sung)
I got a contract
You signed a contract
Go read your contract
And I will count to ten
And then I’ll sue you
Ah, yes, I’ll sue you
And when I sue you
You’ll never work again
MAN 3
(spoken)
Excuse me, but who is the equity representative
BAMBI
(spoken)
I am, Mrs. Bernstein
As equity deputy I must warn you
That any further threats
And you will be brought up on charges
CARMEN
(spoken)
Ah, SHUT UP, ELAINE!
BAMBI
(spoken)
The name is Bambi, mother.
CARMEN
(sung)
A-right, let’s put it this way
For the backers they keep asking your permission
To let the show go on
MAN
NO!
CARMEN
The show must go on
WOMAN
NOT A CHANCE!
CARMEN
The show must go on
MAN
Why?
CARMEN
Cause I say the show must go on
Company
Horse Shit
CIOFFI
(spoken)
I can’t believe I’m hearing this
I won’t believe it
Putting on a musical has gotta be the most fulfilling
thing a person could ever hope to do
You people you’re all heroes to me
(sung)
You’re a special kind of people known as show people
You live in a world of your own
The audience paid plenty to sit there and clap
Hearing you sing, watching you tap
Did you know your dentist longs to be in show business
Your window washer wants to be a star
And though your analyst may
Never couch it that way
CARMEN
(spoken)
Analyst, couch, ha ha.
CIOFFI
(sung)
You don’t know how lucky you are
Some policemen and detectives dream of show business
They can’t arrested, but still
They sit around the station and fancy this life
They jeer Sherlock Holes
And cheer Mack the Knife
CARMEN
Ask your cleaning lady, “Don’t you dream of show
business
To vocalize or stretch beside a bar?”
CIOFFI
Her affirmative shrug
As she shampoos your rug
CIOFFI & CARMEN
Let’s you know how lucky you are
There’s a special kind of aura
‘Round a show person
OSCAR
Just ask the next waiter you meet
CHRISTOPHER
He walks in fifth position
His voice is just grand
GEORGIA
He gives you the check
Ya give him a hand
ALL
If the boys in valet parking turned to show business
They could scalp a higher ticket for your car
OSCAR
And my tree surgeon now
Started taking a bow
(spoken)
A Bough, get it? B-o-u-g
EVERYONE ELSE
You don’t know how lucky you are
COMPANY
We’re a special kind of people known as show people
We live in a world of our own
Our days are tied to curtains
They rise and they fall
We’re born every night
At half-hour call
JOHNNY
(spoken)
Half hour!
COMPANY
We can’t picture being anything but show people
Civilians find the whole thing quite bizarre
But that hop in our hearts
When the overture starts
Helps us know how lucky we are
CARMEN
(spoken)
Show people
CARMEN
(spoken)
Show people
CARMEN
(spoken)
Come on!
Everybody
COMPANY
It’s an honor and a joy to be in show business
I feel that spotlight hit me and I’m gone
At the last curtain call
I’m the envy of all
So I know the show must
CARMEN
(sung)
GO ON!
COMPANY
So thrilling! We’re show people!
CARMEN
And on!
COMPANY
So willing! We’re show people!
CARMEN
And on!
COMPANY
So thrilling that show people
EVERYBODY
GO ON!