Kunt & The Gang Paperboy
Gonna tell you a little story ‘bout my paperboy
P..p..paperboy, p..p..paperboy
Its' not a very happy one, won't bring ya joy
B..b..bring ya joy, b..b..bring ya joy
My paperboy looks just like this girl
I used to fancy at school
I never plucked up the courage to ask her out
Cos she was always a bit too cool
But now I'm older and more confident
I'm going to turn back the clock
By tricking my paperboy into my shed
And introducing him to some soft pornography
1-2-a-1-2-3-4
Paperboy, paperboy
I never thought that I would rape a boy
Till he came along, now I'm singing this song
About raping a paperboy
He delivers the local news
On a Thursday afternoon
I hear him whistling down the path
But he won't be so cheerful soon
His family will be on the TV news
Putting out a tearful plea
But he isn't dead, he's trapped in my shed
Crying and waiting for me
Dressed in a girls' school uniform
1-2-you gotta sing along now
Paperboy, paperboy
I never thought that I would rape a boy
Till he came along, now I'm singing this song
About raping a paperboy
Of course I haven't raped my paperboy
That's as twisted as you could get
I've restricted myself to having a wank
Watching him from behind my net
I know some blokes will hear this song
And try and give me a fight
But last week he turned 16
So legally that's alright
1-2-at least I'm not a paedo
Paperboy, paperboy
I never thought that I would rape a boy
Till he came along, now I'm singing this song
About raping a paperboy
Paperboy, paperboy
Of course I'd never really rape a boy
I know that it's wrong, I'm just singing a song
About raping and raping
Till his arsehole's gaping
Raping a paperboy