Negativland Cadillac
You have to be able to eat... other animals
Thinking of buying a small, sporty car?
(Yes!) Small small Small small Small, sporty car?
(Yeah.) (I sure am.) (Uh, yes!)
Think of Cadillac
(I was thinking of an A—)Cadillac
(I was thinking of a Tw—)Cadillac
(I was thinking of a D—)Cadillac
(Well, I was thinking of a—)Cadillac
(Uh, how 'bout—)Cadillac
Cadillac Cadillac
Cadillac Cadillac Cadillac-illac Cadillac-illac Cadillac
[repeat “Cadillac” pattern ad nauseam in background]
Some of the world's most exciting cars are exciting because they want you dead!
Ride the accident!
Ride the accident!
[Cadillac pattern pauses]
*We hope you never need to use your car,*
Come on, ride the accident!
*But just to be on the safe side, why don't we head out for a drive now?*
Come on!
Vylpux Street
Bottananny Drive
Excize Avenue
Pelldop Way
(Unbelievable!)
Pellandular Boulevard
(So special.)
East Gagenaut Court
(All the energy.)
Polygon Plaza
(An intelligent energy.)
LaneZenor... at Sewerage Street
(The power!)
Splitchmont Scenic Highway
(Cannot get enough energy.)
Fustellation Avenue
(You have to be able to eat)
Blithmeister Street
(And people don't realize, animals)
Beef!
(... cannot get enough energy from the sun.)
[resume Cadillac pattern]
Ride the accident!
That's it...
Come on, come on
Come on, come on, ride the accident
Come on
Ride the accident!
Come on!
[pause Cadillac pattern]
*And it's exhilarating to let go of the wheel*
(The power!)
*Relinquish control of the vehicle*
(So strong!)
That's it...
*Relinquish controlllllll*
(Alright) (okay)
Ride the accident!
(There may not even be... bacteria left)
(Well maybe we're in a simulation right now)
You may notice a slight pulsation in the possible
These conditions are normal, and this may cause you to lose control
The typical food item on an American plate has traveled thirteen to fifteen *hundred* miles to get there
(Fossil fuels *are* our food.)
(The power!)
*And it's exhilarating to let go of the wheel*
Ride the accident!
*Wow. You're not a terrorist at all.*
[children:] Yayyyyyyy!!
Megaplexure Boulevard
Wacadelioprude Way
(Ride)
Treatment Plant Court
North Drepulate Street
(Ride)
Snugular Place
Organeater Avenue
(Ride)
Liplodginens Boulevard
Cyboxycycle Circle
Pellandular Boulevard
Lexicott Road
Plasticwood Way
Butternut Squeam! Drive!
(Ride)
The goddamn Cellagutchean
Useless Seedless Throughway
That's it...
*I don't want any children! I just—I don't want any children, please! I'm afraid... I don't—I don't wanna be hurt, please (please)*
Three a.m. and ninety miles an hour
The vanishing point suddenly attaches itself to the freeway!
In five seconds you will overtake the horizon
Ride the accident!
[resume Cadillac pattern]
Come on, come on
Come on, come on
Ride the accident!
Come on, come on, ride the accident
Come on
*Would you give up your standard of living?*
The roads are burning!
*Would you give up enjoying life?*
Every road is burning!
*Would you give up your automobile?*
(But now you're calling us animals!)
We're traveling
On burning
(even though we are awake!)
Roads
(We'll use each other, then
Won't we?)