Shayna Leigh Jerry Seinfeld
A CAST OF CHARACTER ACTORS THROUGH MY REVOLVING DOOR
A LAZY SUSAN OF SUITORS FROM LOCAL AND OBSCURE
I'M RUNNING RACES THROUGH FACES I'LL PROBABLY IGNORE
SO MANY PANICKED ROMANTICS TRYIN' TO WIND ME UP
MAYBE MY HEART'S A PROCRASTINATOR BUT WHAT'S THE RUSH
I'D RATHER CANCEL BEFORE WE START THE STORY OF US, US
POOR MR. RIGHT WHO GOT THE JOKE WRONG
TOUGH LUCK
IT DON'T MAKE ME JERRY SEINFELD
JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T FILL MY TIME SLOT
SO WHAT
IT DON'T MAKE ME JERRY SEINFELD
CAN'T GET MY TIME OR YOUR MONEY BACK
USED TO BE FUNNY NOW I NEED A LAUGH TRACK
LOOKIN FOR LOVE IS SUCH A SIT COM
SHUT UP
CAUSE I'M NOT JERRY SEINFELD
YOU SAY YOU'RE MID-RENOVATION, WE END UP ON MY COUCH
YOU CLAIM YOUR PLACE IS PALATIAL BUT IT'S YOUR MOMMA'S HOUSE
I HOPE YOUR MOMMA'S AT HOME, YOU MIGHT BE NEEDING HER NOW
MOSTLY THEY DON'T GET MY GIST, AT BEST IT'S ONE AND DONE
MAYBE A MEANINGFUL MISTER'S LATE IN THE SEASON
IT'S STILL A SHOW ABOUT NOTHING PLAYING ON RERUN
POOR MR. RIGHT WHO GOT THE JOKE WRONG
TOUGH LUCK
IT DON'T MAKE ME JERRY SEINFELD
JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T FILL MY TIME SLOT
SO WHAT
IT DON'T MAKE ME JERRY SEINFELD
CAN'T GET MY TIME OR YOUR MONEY BACK
USED TO BE FUNNY NOW I NEED A LAUGH TRACK
LOOKIN FOR LOVE IS SUCH A SIT COM
SHUT UP
CAUSE I'M NOT JERRY SEINFELD
BRIDGE: I'M NOT JERRY SEINFELD chant
REPEAT CHORUS